Where do we go from here?

[Deleted]

Emma hadn't been this nervous about having a discussion in a very, very long time. She had felt awful when Marian had come back from the past with her and Killian, thus ruining Regina's happiness.. and now she was right there with her. Sure, Killian was never married to Milah, but he might as well have been. He had been devastatingly in love with the woman.. and how could she come between them now that she was back? She had come back to life.. what was to happen now? No.. she wouldn't back down. She couldn't. Could she? Should she? So many things were running through her mind. She thought she'd have answers by now.. but she had none. The best thing she could do, was to wait for Killian to meet her so that they could talk.

She had told him to meet her at the docks.. she figured it was a fitting place. Currently she was wrapped up in a warm coat since it was night time, and she was holding two coffees.. one for her, and one for Killian. She would have probably spiked them, but she wanted to have this conversation sober. When she heard someone walking toward her, she turned her head to the side, and there she saw him..walking toward her. She wondered what was going through his mind.. But then again.. she didn't want to wonder too much. Her imagination wasn't being very nice to her as of late. "Killian," She stood up, nearly forgetting how to breathe. "Thanks for meeting me. I..I brought you some coffee." Okay, Emma wasn't one to beat around the bush. "Let's get this off like a bandaid. Your true love is back from the dead, Hook. What happens now?"

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

Bloody hell. Those were the only words that Hook could describe this situation as, for it encompassed a great deal. Milah was back. She was here, truly here. And . . . he was with Emma. He knew he should be ecstatic that Milah was alive, but things were, complicated. There were two women in his entire 200 years of life that he would never betray and both of them were here now. What did he do? What was the right thing to do? The honorable one? Was there even an honorable one? Regina had been in a similar situation, however Robin had been married so her 'honorable' mindset had encouraged him to go to his wife . . . but that lasted a short while, so he heard.

Right now, he was on his way to talk to Emma. He had been in his room at Granny's bed and breakfast for some time, trying to figure out what to say, how to process all of this -- especially after the encounter between the three of them. But even after, his mind was still blank in what to say to fix this. There was no way to do so. Usually, his cocky and arrogant self could joke and charm his way out of any situation. For so long, he had found ways to be with Emma, to convince her that they belonged together. And now . . . while he obviously loved her, his past had caught up to him -- in the most unexpected of ways. He saw her at the docks and paused for a moment. Taking a deep breath he approached her, for the first time in his life feeling a strong sense of insecurity.

"Swan," he greeted in a quiet voice. She thanked him for meeting and extended a coffee to him. "Cheers," he said in thanks, so tempted to add some rum into it but was well aware that he should be completely sober for this. That straight to the point Emma then questioned the subject at hand. It was one of the qualities he loved about her, but right now, he was at a loss of what to say. He may not know what a bandaid was, but he could understand the reference in this context. He quietly sat on the bench, hoping for her to join him so they could at least be seated for this. Who knows how long it would take for him to give a suitable answer. If there was even one that existed. True love. How was it that he loved two women so intensely? The only two women he had ever loved.

He knew he should have the answers, just like he always did . . . even if they were spoken in a teasing or cheeky kind of way. But his mindset did not permit him to do so right now. "I don't know," he admitted, almost ashamed for making this admittance. He took a sip of the coffee, distracting his lips from moving and from words coming out while he continued to think. And think. And think. There were some words he could say right now, ones that were genuine. "I'm sorry, Emma. For how you must be feeling right now." He never wanted to hurt her. Nor did he want to hurt Milah. Both women deserved far better, and neither should be 'the other woman'. Killian would not approach this situation like that, he absolutely refused to.

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[Deleted]

Seeing Killian.. Emma thought it would make things better, but it didn't. It certainly didn't make her feel worse.. it just made her feel twisted up inside. Conflicted. She suddenly knew how Regina had felt when Marian had come with her and Killian through the portal from the past. When Killian took the coffee, and sat down on the bench, she moved to sit beside him. By now, she'd probably have greeted him with a kiss, or cuddled up against him, or something..but right now, that was a little inappropriate considering the circumstances. She waited for him to speak, and his words made her.. ache. She knew it wasn't going to be easy for him, but she had a little bit of hope that things would be solved easily..but nothing like that happened here in Storybrooke. 

He apologized for what she had to be feeling, and she just sat there quiet for several moments. "I feel the same way for you, Killian..I can't imagine what you're going through right now...but...let's face it. This is Milah we're talking about. If she had still been alive, you would have never..." Then the sudden realization set in, that he would have still been with her. Things would have went completely differently. "She's a sweet person, Hook.." she then looked at him, and felt her stomach tying in knots. "And maybe.. maybe the two of you belong together, and this is a sign." And maybe it was Karma for her bringing Marian back and wrecking Regina's happiness. "I...I can make this really easy for you, and I can leave right now. It's not going to be easy for me.. but she was first. It was always Milah.." she could feel the sting of tears rising in her eyes. "But it's gonna be really, really hard for me because.. Because I love you." And there it was. The thing she'd been keeping locked inside that she couldn't hide any longer. What a great time to say it too.. Emma had horrible timing. 

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

He remained quiet, listening attentively to Emma as she explained what she was thinking. She started with voicing her own understanding of how difficult this was for him . . . but her words also took a turn in the conversation. She was speaking of how had Milah been alive, he and Emma would have never been together. The thought was a bit . . . unsettling. Was that even the right word to use? For all that Emma had made him feel, he couldn't imagine not feeling that. And yet, disagreeing would make it sound like he wished Milah had died. Which, wasn't the case. Really, there was no good way of putting it. Emma stated that she was a sweet person. Aye. That she was. But Hook continued to remain silent. It wasn't until she spoke her next words that he felt numb.

He turned his head to look at her, in time too for she was now looking at him. She was telling him that they belonged together, that her return was a sign, that she could make this easy for him and walk away . . . that it had always been Milah. Killian couldn't find the words to speak. It wasn't easy; none of this was. Regardless of what happened, it would be far from any semblance of easy. Still, he remained silent. Not until she spoke her last words, that he felt a rush of emotion flood his heart; taking over every ounce of his being. I love you. She loved him. Words that he knew were not easy for her to say. And yet, here she was, saying them to him now in the height of all this. Despite the complicated situation, he couldn't help but feel a strong sense of honor and joy, that she loved him. Though he knew it was selfish, because it was her love for him that was making her hurt right now. And he never, ever wanted to hurt her. He supposed it was too late for that thought and despite his efforts . . . he had failed.

He looked at the ground in front of him, trying to formulate a response. "Hell of a time to tell me that, Swan," he said teasingly, though it lacked the usual joviality that his teases and jests entailed. Letting a few more moments of silence linger, he continued to speak. "You think it would be easy for me to watch you walk away?" He questioned. She told him that it was always Milah, but that was no longer the case. It had been for a period of time, and it had taken him decades to recover from her death. But he had found Emma and with her, had encountered and embraced so many emotions and feelings of love. "None of this is easy," he told her in a voice that sounded almost defeated. Because he was truly at a loss of what to do.

"Milah was indeed the love of my life." In a different time; in a different world. "But then I met you,. And you showed me that it was possible to feel again." To be in love again. He turned his head to look at her, not wanting her to doubt his next words; wanting her to see the sincerity in his eyes. "You showed me that it was possible to love again. Because I love you too, Swan. And if you think of a second that my feelings for you are lessened in any way, then you are damn well mistaken." Just because Milah was here, didn't make him love Emma less. He loved her. He had for so long. And hearing that she reciprocated those feelings was so bittersweet. If she thought the easy thing for him to do was for her to decide to walk away . . . well, she was wrong. Utterly wrong. And he wasn't shy in saying that right now.

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[Deleted]

Hook was right.. she had -horrible- timing. But it was something that she had to get off of her chest, and something he needed to know. He had explained to her that it wasn't easy..that none of it was easy. Of course she knew that.. but then again she didn't. She was never in that position.. not like this. Sure, it was a little difficult when she, Neal, and Hook were all in Neverland together, but this was... so much more intense. When he told her that his feelings for her hand't lessened, she also knew that.. but she didn't speak until he was finished. Even after that, she just continued to stare in to his eyes. "I should leave.. I should do the right thing, and let you be with Milah. Let you.. let you take her and sail away in to the sunset. But i'm not doing that." She was feeling her heart aching.. she was so stuck. What was she to do? 

"Instead.. i'm going to do exactly what you did for me. I'm going to fight." Although her voice trembled, she still kept her tone firm, showing him that she wasn't joking. "I'm going to fight for you, and nothing is going to stop me. I know i'm the daughter of Snow White, and i'm supposed to put everyone's feelings first, but you're the first man to make me feel.. This. And i'm not giving you up that easily." She leaned in, without any hesitation, and she captured his lips with her's. It felt a bit odd, doing so, but they were together.. and nothing had changed that.. not yet. Not until he said otherwise. And telling him she loved him wasn't enough. She had to pour every ounce of emotion in to that kiss..and she was doing  just that.

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

Hook wasn't entirely sure what she was going to do or say. Just as he had no idea of what his own actions would be. She told him that she should leave . . . that that was the right thing to do and allow him to be with Milah. The thought of Emma leaving from his life suddenly filled his heart with a strong panic, though he concealed it. He couldn't imagine a life without her and he knew it was entirely selfish of him to ask her to stay right now. She finished her words by saying that she wasn't going to do that, and this peaked his curiosity. Her next words explained further what she meant by this. She was going to fight for him.

The words caused his heart to swell with that same honor and pride . . . knowing that she believed he was worth fighting for. Emma certainly had been. He had never perused a woman like he did her, and it was because he knew she was a rarity. That he loved her and had been unable to dismiss the thought of being with her. He would have kept fighting fro her, no matter what obstacles stood in their way. And now, to hear that she felt the same way for him . . . that she was willing to fight for him . . . well, he didn't even know what to say to that. It meant more to him than he could possibly say. All of her words did. Not only her refusal to let him go, but also her saying that he was the first to make her feel this way. He hated that he was hurting her right now, knowing how she felt and how devoted she was to him. How could he have ever been so fortunate to have gained the love and affections of Emma Swan? He didn't deserve it. Not in the slightest.

Thankfully, as words escaped him, Emma found an alternate way to react . . . by leaning forward and kissing him. He instantly reacted, closing his eyes, the pleasure of her touch causing all the emotions they often did to stir within him. But this time, there was a stronger intensity to them. And he knew full well why. For he was returning it. Fervent and almost desperate passion that seeped out in his kiss; desperate to show her how much he loved her. Had he not been clutching the coffee with his hand, he would have touched her cheek. Instead, he titled his head to the side to gain a better angle and easier access, deepening the kiss, wanting to explore and appreciate the source of where her beautiful words came out of. Words that stated her love for him and willingness to fight.

Aye. He knew he was being selfish and unfair, but right now, all he could focus on was the kiss and what it meant; what she was trying to convey in it. He brought the kiss to a slow end, slightly short of breath from their passionate embrace, and not pulling far from her lips. He rested his forehead against hers, taking a moment to catch his breath. "I don't know what I did to ever deserve you, Swan," he told her in a low voice, heard by the close proximity of their mouths. "I can't let you go," he added, admitting his selfishness. He didn't want to see her walk away; he didn't want her to leave him.

"I need you." The admittance that he needed anyone was a difficult one to make, but they were sincerely spoken words. He didn't know what was going to happen . . . he didn't know how this would all play out. But right now, in this moment, he needed her to know this. Unable to restrain himself any longer -- as he was uncertain when they would get another chance to do this -- he closed the distance between them again, deeply kissing her with intense emotions that filled his entire body . . . and this kiss was an outlet for that.

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[Deleted]

Emma felt her heart swell with relief and happiness when he returned her kiss. There had to have been so much running through his mind, but for a moment, albeit brief, she wanted them to forget about their troubles, and just be...them. Captain Swan, as they had been coined. The kiss made her feel lighter than air for the first time all day. It had been a long.. long day. Once the kiss ended, he told her that he didn't know what he did to deserve her. She kind of wondered the same about herself. What did she do to deserve someone who had fought for her so persistently? She had gotten his heart, and she had done nothing to deserve it. Still..they had each other now, and Emma wouldn't let that go. Not with how much they had gone through so far.

He also told her he couldn't let her go.. He needed her. She needed him, as well. "Hook," she started in a soft voice, giving him a little grin. "You couldn't shake me if you wanted to at this point." Emma was far too invested emotionally. Not to mention she even dropped the bomb that she loved him. This was something that she could have held on to for a long time.. and maybe this was what she needed. A reason to tell him how she felt about him.. something to make her either make her move or let the man she loved go. "I can't let you go either. I don't know how this is going to work, or what's going to happen, but I'm not giving up on you. On us."

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

Hook gave an ever so slight smile though it wasn't filled with the genuine happiness he often felt when in her presence. Of course he was happy with her, but he feared that he was going to hurt her . . . that he was already hurting her. He loved her a great deal and never did he think he would have to consider this. It seemed so easy to just continue to be with her, but seeing Milah again had caused feelings to resurface; ones that he had buried with her when he believed her to be dead and ones that had taken decades to fully heal. Only now, they were unleashed; as if a Pandora's box had been opened and caused a rush of emotions to uncontrollably rush through him.

"Neither will I," he told her when she spoke of how she wouldn't give up on them. He wasn't about to either. He could not dismiss his relationship with Emma . . . nor could he just ignore Milah's presence. "Bloody hell, never did I think this was possible," he began to say, turning his head to look at the open and vast water in front of them. "After Baelfire, I thought we were done with love triangles," he said, in an attempt to lighten the mood though the joviality that was often present with his teases was lacking. For his words held the burden of truth.

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[Deleted]

Things were going to be hard..Emma knew that. But she also wasn't one to give up on anything. She was far too stubborn to lose him. She'd lost enough love in her life and she wouldn't give him up this time. "I fell in love with you Hook. You crumbled every one of my defenses that I tried putting up, and I refuse, refuse to lose you. I'm done being the savior, putting everyone else first. I'm being selfish for once in my life. I understand that you had a past with Milah..that the two of you were in love..but it's us now." She felt as though her breath were bated. She had felt him slipping away, and she needed to hold on to him with every fiber of her being..otherwise she'd be lost. She needed him. He was her anchor. 

When he mentioned love triangles, more specifically the one with herself, Hook, and Baelfire, she cringed. "Guess it's been replaced by a love triangle with Neal's mom. We really need some new blood around here..."  She said in an almost teasing voice. It really was strange though..and something she'd likely never get used to. "But... I can't help but wonder..How? How is she here? Is this something that's gonna keep happening? Because the love triangles could really escalate, and i'm not ready for pyramids just yet." She teased once more. She was trying desperately to keep the mood as light as possible. 

There was no sense in being dramatic, even though the situation would definitely call for those actions.. it just wasn't her style. This would be handled as calmly and as fairly as possible.. but there was something she knew deep down.. some way.. some how...she'd win the Pirate's heart. 

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

Everything that Emma was saying to him right now were things that he had longed to hear. To know that she was in love with him; that she was willing to fight for him; that she would place all else second . . . all these things he had wanted to hear for so long. And now, when she said them, while it gave him a strong joy to hear it, it also caused his heart to ache, wishing that things could be more simple. He had known that being with her would have its obstacles as she was the savior and thus, demanded by many, pressured to fulfill a grand destiny. But he had been so willing to give up everything and anything if only to be with her.

Yet now . . . it was on his part that there were complications, and he hated that he was putting her through this. He clenched his jaw, looking down at the warm beverage he still clutched in his hand. He wished he knew what to say; that he could just make light of the whole thing and offer a joke and a tease to help ease the tense subject. But for once, he was incapable of doing so. "Us," he repeated. "I like the sound of that," he admitted softly, though knew that this was far from simple or easy. "Somehow I think it would be easier if you just told me to go to hell," he somewhat joked, only half kidding. Instead, she was telling him everything he wanted to hear, and words could not express how much it made his heart swell with such contrasting emotions.

"I honestly don't even know what to say right now," he admitted. "Not the first time you've left me speechless though, Swan," he said with slight teasing, though his tone was still far too reflective of the circumstances that were burdening the conversation. "But I do know that I love you. And that I'm being the selfish one right now. And I'm sorry for all this. I wish I could tell you that none of this is worth your pain." That he wasn't worth it. "But alas. The selfish pirate in me can't do such a thing." He thought he had been reformed, yet this proved that he was greedy enough to keep her in his life, and put her through this . . . when love should be about sacrifice. Yet the thought of not having her in his life, filled him with a tremendous fear he could not ignore. One that controlled him now, in silently asking her not to give up on them.

She then remarked on how it had been replaced with a triangle involving Neal's mother. Such a strange concept that was . . . acknowledged by her comment of there needing to be new blood. "Aye," he agreed quietly, and would have found more irony in that, if everything wasn't falling apart right now. She then asked a question that he knew not the answer to; one that had been plaguing his mind since her return. Was she here for good? Was she a vision meant to torment him? Would she suddenly leave as quickly as the Dark One had taken her from him? He didn't know. And knew he had to find out. "I haven't the slightest idea," he answered.

"She just suddenly came," he answered, aware that he would have to get to the bottom of how she was here. "And I don't know if she will just as suddenly vanish." Would that be a good thing? Why did the thought of her leaving so suddenly worry him? Make him feel . . . whatever he had since the moment she had come. "It won't escalate," he promised her. "It can't." He knew it was his own hope rather than anything that he had control over. He was trying to convince himself just as much as he was trying to convince her.

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[Deleted]

Emma didn't know why there was a force keeping her from having a happily ever after, but it was starting to really piss her off. Still though, she kept her calm. She had to.. otherwise, she'd break down, and then everyone else would fall like a set of dominoes. Or.. at least that's how she saw things in her mind. Perhaps the Savior put too much on her shoulders, deciding to carry everyone's burdens.. but that was who she was. But she couldn't help but wonder.. why her and Hook? Of all happy endings to crumble, why did it have to be them? She shook away the thought, refusing to let herself think that way. Nothing would break them apart..Emma wouldn't let it. Not after she finally allowed herself to start believing again. 

Killian told her it would have been easier if she told him to go to hell. She simply smirked. "You've already been there, only it was called Neverland. I don't think that wishing you to hell would have made anything better. Besides, i've already tried that, remember? You were still persistent." She teased. "And now.. it's my turn to be optimistic." Even the sound of the word made her cringe. Emma was a realist.. never anything different. Now though, things were different, and she felt that if she didn't look on the positive side of the spectrum, that everything would fall apart, and she just couldn't have that. He had said that he didn't know what to say..that she left him speechless. "Killian.. You don't have to say anything." But he did. He told her he loved her..apologized for the situation they were all in. 

"I'm a big girl, Killian. I know what i'm getting myself in to... mostly. Granted, I didn't sign up for a love triangle with someone who had just come back from the dead..but we'll make it through this. And if.." Now this was going to be the difficult part. "If we don't... then that bridge will be crossed when we come to it." She was trying to keep calm, and indifferent, but inside there was a sense of fear, and anger that was causing the street lamp near the bench to flicker. "For right now, we'll just handle this the best way we can. I'm still yours, Killian." It was going to be interesting to see how this whole situation was taken by Milah. She hadn't really had an opinion so far.. it was likely that  Milah was just as confused and disoriented as the rest of them. 

He didn't know how Milah came back from the dead, but he was sure that it wouldn't happen again.. or at least it seemed like he had hoped that it wouldn't. She had to admit that it would be nice to see some of her lost loved ones again..but it would just cause more pain and confusion. Although, she and Neal would likely merely be friends if he came back, it would still be a difficult time. "If it helps... we could keep our distance from each other for a couple of days. Maybe you should spend some of that time with Milah..and some of it to yourself to think." She really didn't want to say it. She didn't even want to think it.. but she had to hold on to some sort of logic, and fairness. "As much as it'll drive me crazy...it's not fair for Milah for us to keep being with each other twenty-four seven. She still sees it that you two are together..she's confused, and lost and i'm sure she's in a lot of pain, too. We have to handle this situation lightly." She took a deep breath. "Even though I really just want to kiss you again and never stop." 

Emma couldn't stop another thought from racing through her head... Milah would try to kiss him. She -would- likely kiss him. Why wouldn't she? And even though it sparked enough jealousy inside of the savior that the street lamp flickered again, she managed to ease it down and swallow it just as she was attempting to swallow her pride. Maybe the kiss needed to happen. A kiss might just be the thing that Killian needed to make his decisions easier. Well then.. apparently this would be a little more painful than she thought. 

[Killian Jones]

It's Always Nice

TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION

She was certainly right about that. About both points. That he had been to the depths of hell, better known as Neverland, and that she had tried that already and he had kept trying to win her heart. Which he now had. Which he now felt guilty for, because he was causing the hurt inside of her . . . something he had never, ever wanted to do. Something he'd vowed never to do. But alas, he had made a liar out of himself and loathed himself for it. "Still. This time I would understand," he admitted quietly, knowing her well enough to know that she would not do that. Hell, if anything, it was a quality in her that made him love her so much. Her rationality. Which she was proving more and more as the conversation progressed.

Hearing her say that it was her turn to be an optimist, caused a very small small on the pirate's lips. It was usually he trying to offer optimistic words, yet now it seemed that the tables had turned and she was attempting to do so. He also knew it was not easy for her, which made him appreciate it all the more. She assured him that he didn't have to say anything, but that had not stopped him. He knew what he had to say, and it was only a little compared to all that he should be saying. She knew what she had gotten herself into, but he also knew that this was not what he had promised her. Hearing her present the possibility of them perhaps not coming out of this . . . well, he was rather glad it was left ambiguous. "I know that this, was not what I promised you, Swan," he began to say, vocalizing his thoughts that plagued his mind.

"I never meant, nor mean to hurt you." He needed her to know that. He could apologize again and again, profusely for this . . . and even then, it would not be enough. "And I know you are more than capable of handling this. But . . . it's not what I intended. It's not what I imagined as I pursued you and each time you pulled away. I know you've been hurt in the past, and I despise the fact that I am no longer the exception to this." He thought he could make her happy and perhaps he had for a brief time, but now, it seemed as if everything they had worked so hard to achieve, was unraveling. He could not imagine his life without her. So he could not even consider the idea of them not making it through this. Yet Milah was not far from his mind either. She then made an offer that Killian himself was far too weak to have suggested himself. Thank god for Emma and all the the strength she possessed.

He did not fail to notice the light flickering, though did his best to avoid staring at her, aware that her emotions were causing it to do so. Further evidence of how much she was feeling in this moment, and he imagined it was hardly the emotions of a good and enjoyable sort. He remained silent, knowing what she said was true and right. He did need to spend time with Milah. He needed to properly explain things to her. She was horribly confused, disoriented, and . . . well, it was Milah. "Aye," he said softly in agreement. He knew he had to and at the same time, thinking of distance between he and Emma was a difficult thought indeed. He was here in Storybrooke for her, and yet, they needed that space in order to figure this out. She was right, in everything she said, and ironically, it made Killian's heart swell with love for the woman before him. A bittersweet feeling for the more he felt his love for her, the more he hated himself for what he was putting her through.

Noticing the lights flicker again, he turned his head to look at her, holding the coffee between his legs as he placed his hand over hers in attempt to comfort her and bring whatever ease to her that he could. Though perhaps he was just making it worse. "Well then perhaps we should, for old time's sake," he said in slight teasing, as he leaned toward her, finding her lips with his own. He couldn't resist. If he was not going to be able to see her, he wanted to kiss her, knowing it was not right considering Milah was there and unaware of everything that had happened. But if this was goodbye -- even just temporarily -- he wanted to kiss her, and let his love for her be expressed through this embrace. Slowly bringing a kiss to a slow halt, he pulled away, though kept their faces close for quite some time as his eyes remained close, taking in every detail of this moment.

"You're a lot stronger than I am, Swan," he admitted, having no issue with making such an admittance. He lightly kissed her lips once more before pulling away yet again. "Thank you," he whispered near her lips. For allowing him this, because he lacked the strength to ask for it . . . knowing it needed to be done, yet hating to voice the necessity. "I too am yours. And a part of me always will be." Regardless of what happens. She had claimed his heart, after he had thought it no longer beat. And there would always be her mark left on it, no matter what the future entailed.

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Emma was strong...she had to be. Always. She grew up, mostly, on her own. She had trusted no one for so long, because every time she did, the rug would be swept out from underneath her feet and she'd fall. She knew that this was one of those times to guard herself.. to stand firm. Even though the outcome of the situation could possibly leave her with a broken heart, she knew deep down that she had to be a pillar. She was the one for everyone else to lean on.. and this included Killian now as well. Her heart ached at the thought of not being with him after all they had gone through..and yet, she couldn't help but wonder how sick he must have been feeling.. how conflicted, and torn. It was while they sat on that bench, baring their emotions to each other, that she decided she'd be strong enough for both of them. 

"Hook," she sighed, trying to keep things light. As light as she possibly could, so that the tears wouldn't have room to fall. "You couldn't have known that something like this was going to happen. None of us could have figured this one out..." she gently bit her bottom lip, looking in to his eyes. Those eyes.. those eyes that she tried to deny loving for so long.. suddenly, she started to feel that all too familiar stinging behind her eyes. "What ever happens, this isn't your fault, and you've gotta stop apologizing. Alright? I don't blame you.. I never will." Emma could have suddenly started feeling animosity toward Milah, someone she didn't even know..but why? What good would come of it? It wasn't her fault, either. This was no secret agenda.. this woman had been through a lot..and Emma wasn't about to take something so special away from her unless it was mutual. Milah needed to know everything.. it was fair. 

Killian still had his cockiness about him. That was shining brightly through when he leaned in and kissed her, 'for old time's sake'. The kiss felt powerful. It was so much more than a random kiss between lovers. This was a kiss that rocked Emma to her very core.. one that could have said 'Until our lips meet again', or 'Goodbye...'. Emma returned his kiss with every ounce of love that she felt for this man, and she was sure that some desperation leaked in to the kiss as well. She knew it wasn't fair, but she hoped against hope that it would be her that would be his happy ending. However, she was a firm believer in the Hope for the best, expect the worst, motto. 

When the kiss ended, and he told her how strong she was, she had to clench her jaw in order to fake a little smile. "I've had to be strong for a really long time." Her voice slightly trembled, but so far, she was able to keep her composure. He had kissed her once more.. a lighter, softer kiss, and his words that he spoke against her lips made her heart feel as though it were being torn out. "I'll hold you to that, Hook.." she whispered. Her toes curled in her boots, and she tried not to clutch her coffee too tightly so that it wouldn't spill in her hands.. but it was hard to keep herself from crying. She just couldn't let those tears fall. If they did, he'd hurt more... she couldn't let him see her cry. "You better go find Milah.. If you leave her alone around here for too long, the girl will be overwhelmed by cheeseburgers and hot chocolate shoved in to her face every five minutes," she attempted a quiet laugh. "I love you, Killian. I'll see you later." She refused to say Goodbye.